During our 2nd session I was able to explore different areas of Helen’s life and how her reaction to her colleagues, family and people she met in general, was having such a toxic and negative reaction on her mental health – something which Helen had never even been aware of as she just assumed that this was the ‘norm’.
I provided her with my tried and tested ‘cognitive behavioural situation exercises’ and suggested certain books for Helen to read, both of which she found interesting and she enjoyed completing the exercises each week. She commented on how insightful they were and from a cognitive behavioural point of view, we could notice patterns of Helen’s behaviour that were ‘dragging her down’ and causing much of her angst and unhappiness both at home and at work. Through our exploration coaching, Helen could see the areas in her life that were out of balance and which needed much attention.
Helen began to understand, that it was her own reaction towards others that needed to change. Consciously, Helen had never been aware of this, so we continued to delve into how we could move her forward, with some adjustment coaching techniques that were in line with her own personal improvement objectives.
At the end of our sessions and a lot of interaction and commitment from Helen, she became very empowered. She no longer said ‘yes’ to everyone and was quite selective with her group of friends and was enjoying her social life far more than previous.
Helen also learned to say NO to certain family members and colleagues when they were, as she called it, ‘putting on her’ which released her from the guilt she was feeling – for no apparent reason! She still spent time with her family, but less so at the gatherings that made her feel uncomfortable. She said NO to colleagues when they asked her to cover for them whilst they left early and due to this, Helen noticed a change and gained more respect from her peers.
We both began to notice how much this newfound confidence and understanding of her reaction towards others has helped her to feel more in control and happier as a person. She is now far more relaxed about her life and chooses what ‘she’ wants to do and who with and has no problem at all saying NO.